Yeah enough of that, what juicy stuff did we miss? (bar Lady Gaga becoming even more of a meme than she already is. Oh and the Simpsons ‘predicted’ all of that too)
If you were, like me, asleep whilst all this was going on because you quite frankly couldn’t give a toss, here’s what you missed.
New Trailer for Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales
I’m quite surprised this franchise is still going but one should never underestimate the sheer power of Disney I guess. The last movie came out 6 years ago apparently. So I think I’m forgiven for thinking it was truly dead and gone. But of course, I jest, I had seen the first trailer for this, so here’s the second:
Good news! Orlando Bloom will return as Will Turner. He wasn’t in the last one, which from what I remember, wasn’t all there. Paul McCartney is also set to appear in the film, which releases on the 26th May. So let’s hope this is a good one!
New Trailer for Guardians of the Galaxy 2
So. Much. Hype. For. This. Guardians of the Galaxy, which released in 2014, was an absolute masterpiece from Marvel. And yes, I’m still sad about Groot. But now there’s Baby Groot! And of course, Chris Pratt as the ridiculous Starlord, Zoe Saldana as Gamora, Dave Bautista as Drax, and everyone’s favourite nerd raccoon Rocket, voiced by Bradley Cooper.
The trailer makes it seem this one is going to be just as hilariously fantastic as the first. This ones coming out on the 5th May, so make sure you can check it out, and watch the first one if you haven’t already – it’s on UK Netflix at present.
Stranger Things: Season 2 announced, starting on Halloween
Definitely the one you would’ve heard about if you’ve been functioning today, but just in case it’s been a tough Monday, I’ll remind you: Stranger Things, the TV series exclusive to Netflix, is getting a second season, and it’s coming at the spookiest time of the year. And to top it off, the kids are wearing Ghostbusters outfits. Check it out:
Fast & Furious is still a thing
Alright real talk this is still happening?? The 8th film?? The recipe still seems the same. CARS. EXPLOSIONS. TESTOSTERONE. DESTRUCTION. MASCULINITY. RAH!
Transformers: Also still a thing
According to The Guardian, the Transformers franchise has made over $3.7bn at the global box office.Even though I’m more than prepared to give it some stick, like Fast & Furious, for still actually being somewhat relevant, fans continue to go out and watch Transformers films and make them worth making, despite what Mr. Hollywood Review Bloke will say. This will be film number 5, titled, The Last Knight. Mark Wahlberg returns and is joined by Anthony Hopkins, and of course it’s directed by Michael Bay, so get ready for slow-mo’s, lots of bass, and so much lens flare you’ll go blind.
Wolverine’s back in “Logan”
Hugh Jackman’s Wolverine character makes his final appearance in this one, but considering we are talking about Marvel and one of their biggest names, it’s unlikely this is the last we’ll see of this part of the franchise. This one should be out next month.
Eerie sci-fi Thriller “Life”, with Ryan Reynolds and Jake Gyllenhaal
Though the new Alien: Covenant film will set out to hopefully teach people that you can easily run away from falling objects by running the opposite way to the direction that they are falling (re: Prometheus), this one sees a bit more of a creepy, threatening notion set in., and is an excellent little teaser. It’s out in March, if you’re up for a few jumpscares.
The Elder Scrolls Online: Morrowwind Expansion gets a pre-show slot
This is reasonably exciting. I thought ESO was as dead as dead can be, but it’s consistently been the top-grossing MMO on all platforms for the last few years, and now fans can be expected to return to the lands of Vvardenfell in Morrowwind, the location for the 3rd game in Bethesda’s Elder Scrolls series. ESO is kicking around at a relatively low price now, and that comes with a lot of the expansions to an already massive game. Hopefully this will bridge the gap and keep fans engaged until the 6th installment of the franchise is confirmed.
And I do believe that just about wraps things up. Did I miss anything interesting? Let me know in the comments below.